Super Simple and Super Delicious Stovetop Steak

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STEAK.

On a friend's birthday, all you need is steak and whiskey. At least that rule holds true if this is the person you are cooking for:

Gerard DiPippo, Great American.

So, if you find yourself in a position of cooking for Gerard DiPippo, or Ron Swanson, or Jack Donaghy, or if you just really want a good steak and don't have a grill, this is the recipe for you.

Mac'in': Round 2- Falltastic Mac v. Oktoberfest Mac

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Bacon and pretzel bun crumb topping, pre-baking. 

Obviously, I cannot have experimentation macaroni death round matches without my dear partner, Tammy. So, while on a weekend trip up to NYC, I clearly had to devote my entire Sunday to macaroni and cheese.

This time, it was the same Pumpkin Mac I made last week with some minor variations, redubbed "Falltastic Mac" by the Tammiest, versus our "Oktoberfest Mac" (Beer and Brat Mac with Bacon-Pretzel Bun Bread Crumbs). Do not be surprised- we may both dwell on the East Coast, but we spend three years in the Heartland while attending law school in the Midwest. And duh, beer cheese is delicious! 

I am still debating whether my obsession with macaroni and cheese has become troubling..... Read on for the results....

Mac'in': Round 1- Jungle Cat Short Rib Mac Redux v. Pumpkin Mac with Brussels Sprouts Bread Crumb Topping

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Pumpkin beer braised short ribs. I think this is pretty. But again, I suck at food photography and love meat.

Last year, I feel like Julian and I were robbed of victory- even if it was our own fault. We didn't understand that a key component of competitive cooking is stacking the odds in your favor by inviting your friends.

Number of friends we invited last year: 3

Number of friends who came last year: 0

SIGH. So, I am still very proud of our "dark horse" third place finish, BUT THIS YEAR DEFEAT IS NOT AN OPTION. Tammy has already created a FB invite warning our friends of the cook-off 2 months in advance, but we would prefer to win based on our cooking skills and NOT our popularity....

Enter our experimentation death matches in which our test subjects.... errr, friends..... have to gorge themselves on whatever kinds of mac and cheese we make and provide us with constructive feedback. For round 1, I am re-making our relatively successfully Jungle Cat Short Rib Mac and also experimenting with a fall-inspired (if I am honest, mainly Tammy-inspired) macaroni and cheese with pumpkin beer braised short ribs, actual pumpkin in the bechamel, and a hella crazy Brussels sprouts-parmesan-bread crumb topping.

The process of making a pumpkin bechamel may have caused me to rethink my own culinary genius, but read on for the results....

Easter Brunch! (Entirely dairy and gluten free)

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My "tablescape" (the term "tablescape" reminds me a bit too much of Sandra Lee, but considering it's not just orange juice in those glasses, that might be appropriate).

My mom, my friend Fan and I hosted a gluten free and dairy free Easter brunch for nine today. Click through for more pictures and information!

Almond, Coconut and Banana Pancakes: Taking my "elimination diet" to new heights of unhealthiness!

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You know you want to eat these. Also, please note the delicious bacon in the back. Mmmm, bacon.

The "easy" way to do gluten, soy, and dairy free is to eat very simple, healthy foods: fruit, vegetables, meats, and nut products that are simply prepared and not doused in sauces. However, that can get really, really boring, and I like cooking. And I wanted to eat something other than eggs for breakfast.

I am not very experienced with using "alternative" flours, and the idea of fake food grosses me out, so I sought help from the internet in finding an acceptable pancake recipe. This pancake recipe from Against All Grain looked delicious, and had awesome reviews, so I doubled it and made my first attempt at cooking with alternative flour.

Pseudo-Samoa Flourless Chocolate Fudge Cupcakes: Happy Birthday, I am gluten, dairy, and soy free!

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Happy Birthday Mom and Eric!

I am trying an "elimination diet." No gluten, no dairy, no soy. Hopefully this helps with some health issues I've been experiencing, and so far, it's not *that* bad (side note: probably shouldn't be drinking so much wine on an elimination diet, but, eh). Also, I won't lie: I sort of really want the Cool Ranch Dorito Taco from Taco Bell. I should be ashamed of that, but I am not. 

Last weekend at my brother's going away party, everyone else had cake and ice cream, and I got to stare at their plates (guess what I had for dessert: wine!). So, I decided that the only way to ensure that I could eat my mom's birthday cake was to make it myself. I looked at some restrictive diet websites, and although I didn't find a cake recipe that I liked, this flourless fudge brownie recipe over at Yammie's Glutenfreedom did inspire me.

Something Like Saag: Attempting Indian

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This picture doesn't look very appetizing- just very green. 

This isn't really a story. I like Indian food. I am decent at making curries, so why not try saag, since I always order it at Indian restaurants? 

My mom was confused. She kept asking me what it was, and what was in it, and telling me she had "something like this before." I kept telling her it was Indian food, and she kept asking. Ah, Nibblet. 

Simple Spinach and Sausage Lasagna (Lasagne?) for Mina

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Lasagna is kind of ugly.

Lasagna (or apparently, lasagne) is very easy to make, and I guess I could make this post more "exciting"by making my own sauce, but alas, I was lazy yesterday, and Mina requested a lasagna recipe. Additionally, my brother is moving to New Jersey and will be living alone, so this is a basic recipe for him to reference when he has to start cooking for himself regularly. But, the pictures in this post are super boring. 

Also, while I wouldn't describe myself as a super-healthy cook (I love butter, and olive oil, and cheese, and carbs, and the word "paleo" makes me involuntarily scrunch up my face and make gagging noises- sorry!), I always try to ensure that my food isn't devoid of nutritional content, so I did add spinach and onions to this recipe, and only used 3 layers of noodles to avoid making this dish too pasta-heavy.

Butternut Squash Soup: Bribery Helps

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Soup/ Bisque

I think I mentioned this a while ago, but I flew to Florida in late October to be maid of honor in my friend Lauren's wedding. Her ceremony was held at sunset on the beach in St. Pete's, and was absolutely gorgeous, if a bit windy. The reception was a blast (nothing like dancing to Nicky Minaj's "Pound the Alarm" with your mom), and after the dancing ended, my friend Mina almost worked up the courage to go in the ocean. 

Trying to get Mina to go swimming. She has a fear of "natural bodies of water."

Unfortunately, when we woke up the next morning, we all faced the nasty reminder that the winds that had only slightly marred the ceremony the night before were a mild side effect of Super Storm Sandy. With the giant storm approaching the Northeast, many of our flights were delayed or cancelled.

Almond Scones with Orange Glaze

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In addition to slacking off when it comes to posting my recipes and food creations, I can also slack off when it comes to providing requested food items. I told my mom I would make these delicious-looking almond scones for Valentine's Day, and I failed to bake scones until today.

In my defense, I made her three kinds of homemade truffles, and these delicious chocolate cupcakes for Valentine's Day, so I thought the scones might not be fully appreciated with all of the cocoa-based competition:

Side note: Ringing endorsement from my brother- "This is the first scone I've eaten that I haven't felt like I had a mouth full of dirt. Is this how they're supposed to taste? Not like those hard-as-a-rock things from the grocery store?" (Answer to both questions: Yes!). 

Amazing Brined Turkey and Southern Cornbread Stuffing: Belated Thanksgiving Post

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I think this is pretty.

Truth: I am easily distracted, and as much as I like to cook, remembering to turn recipes and crappy iPhone photos into blog posts is not my strong suit. The whole "cooking blog" project was derailed, and I've been refinishing furniture and recently bought a staple gun to do more DIY projects. 

Anyway, I am back at it, and working forward from the oldest pictures in my phone. So, time for my Thanksgiving recipes. I made turkey that was actually delicious! I will never go back to regular turkey again- brining every Thanksgiving from now on! The stuffing ("dressing") was pretty tasty too. 

Red Wine Tri Tip Roast: Cooking Meat is NOT Hard

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Really not that difficult....

My friends always say that they can make pasta or vegetables or fish or whatever, but they don't know how to cook meat. But seriously, it's not hard. If you can turn on an oven and set a timer, you can cook meat. Just don't over cook it. And let it rest. 

Fool proof instructions below. But, if you just don't like touching raw meat (I really think that's a major issue for a lot of people), just get over it.  And turn on your oven.

Shepherd's Pie with Turkey and Butternut Squash: My ugly but delicious, healthy version of a classic

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You are so, so, so ugly... but delicious.

So, I don't cook the healthiest food.... delicious, but not usually something a dietician would endorse. Not to say that I am as bad as Paula Deen, but I also don't consider salads meals. 

This was my attempt to be healthy, and seasonal, and use up random ingredients in my mom's kitchen.

I think it was successful, and my brother agreed... he ate two giant servings. Although, he also called me crazy and "meticulous" for cutting up tons of carrots, celery and onion in the same tiny shapes...

Fall Pasta and Midnight Pasta

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Pasta with pumpkin beer braised short ribs, butternut squash, peppers, onions and tomatoes.

Jungle cats have a mixed history with pasta:

Note: this is simply a reenactment of Julian cooking "midnight pasta."

Pasta is J's go-to late night food. However, J has had mixed success with making midnight pasta, and is the queen of "charred spaghetti." I am not one to gossip, but J may or may not be on speaking terms with her roommate due to an incident last week involving pasta, fire, and the smoke alarm in the wee hours of the morning.

I am more of a "make ahead and microwave" lady, so today I am making a big pot of whole wheat linguine with pumpkin beer braised short ribs, roasted butternut squash, and a red pepper and onion tomato sauce. My mother is out of town, and I am headed to Florida to be in my childhood best friend's wedding, and both of us fear my brother will subsist only on Wendy's unless we leave him with something that is both nutritious and delicious. Also, I am on a hearty fall flavors kick. 

Jungle Cat Short Rib Mac and the Claque's Mac Off!

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Winners' Circle!

It's no secret: we love good cocktails. One of our favorite neighborhood haunts is Huckleberry Bar. They have an amazing spicy tequila cocktail ("The Sampogna"), friendly bartenders who actually know our names (and high-five us.... and give us shots... and maybe think we're crazy), and their food smells amazing. 

During a post-work cocktail, we noticed that they were hosting a a macaroni and cheese cook-off. Of course, we decided to enter (i.e., we sent in a last-minute entry request weeks after official entry had closed, and sent enough emoticon-laden emails that they allowed us in).

Flash forward to this weekend: we buy a ton of cheese, and we make a plan, and then, life happened. Well, our cluster-f*ck dinner party happened, and J fell victim to the weekend work plague. After Saturday's festivities, J arose and made it in to work by 8am, where she slumped over her desk, wrote a memo, and reassessed whether being a corporate lawyer was truly worth it. I slept in, called J to ascertain that we were really doing it, and went to buy the remaining ingredients.

Brussels Sprouts Pizza, Butternut Squash Pizza, and Cluster-F*ck Pizza Parties

Both pizzas, before going in.

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On Friday, we decided to throw a last-minute Saturday night dinner party. Our friends were eager to attend, especially when we promised amazing and seasonally appropriate fare (and booze!), but on Saturday afternoon, we experienced first-hand the major downside of having insanely intelligent and successful friends: weekend work. BOO.

With half of our friends bowing out last minute or expressing uncertainty as to when they could arrive, we revised our menu and settled on pizza with fall ingredients as well as a salted caramel apple tart. However, the food was not the cluster-f*ck portion of the evening....

While I was doing the prep work, Jungle Cat J set out to buy alcohol, flowers, and clean the apartment. Beverages and beautiful arrangements were successfully acquired, and when J set upon the last task, cleaning, some issues...... ummmmm, arose?

Expecting visitors, the commode chose to stop flushing or draining. J waited patiently, then decided an intervention was needed. She set out to purchase a plunger, and returned exasperated, with a very small bag:

K: Plunger?

J: They didn't have any.

K: So.......

J: I bought lipstick and playing cards!

In my mom's words: "lipstick will make the toilet look pretty."